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After thoughtful deliberation on the entries, self-examination of my core values and long walks in a field, I have picked the August cartoon caption winners.
While reading through 130 comments over the course of 13 pages is way more enjoyable than a conference panel on fiber-optic densities, picking the winners is always hard. I thought about going with the random number generator again, but that seemed a little too sterile for a contest based on humor.
So without further hand wringing and navel gazing, here are the winners for August.
Second place and a $75 Amazon gift card: "Everyone, please welcome our newest team member, Bob. He may look familiar to you, as he used to be in security, posted by the lobby entrance" — Faryl
Third place and a $50 Amazon gift card: "The funny thing is... I'm a hologram." — afwriter
And for your Monday reading pleasure, here are some contenders:
"Good to see virtually everyone showed up for today's meeting." — Faryl
" 'Fixing it in post-production' is *not* a viable business strategy." — Faryl
"I don't really know why we still use a conference table in this room..." — Michelle
" I see some of you are joining us from conference room 2." — Michelle
"Well... I suppose I can adjust to this, but can someone please remove the lens cap from camera 3?" — elizabethTV
"OK everyone - let's take five for a buffer break." — jbtombes
"...Um, let's hold off for five minutes. I need you all to go back to your cubes and bring your display screens." — jbtombes
"Let's pan around the room and have everyone introduce themselves." — vnewman
"Sure, we could have set up this meeting without using a conference room at all, but we like to have a personal touch around here." — mhhf1ve
"I'm here so that if any of you speak out of turn, I will place some masking tape over your camera lens. Understood?" — mhhf1ve
"Flu season started early this year, eh? I appreciate everyone trying not to spread their germs, but we really could have re-scheduled this meeting..." — mhhf1ve
"Welcome again to the Dull Life Fantasy Network. For all you cops, firefighters, soldiers, trial lawyers, surgeons, spies, astronauts and power brokers out there, we've got a full-day lineup of soothing meetings, paperwork,and things you barely need to pay attention to, and we pledge that, as always, it will never, ever be any different, or the least bit exciting. Kicking off the day, we have all the regular gang at 'Coffee and Donuts with People Who Tell Endless Stories About Their Families,' followed by Ken and Barbie in 'File My Report...' " — JohnBarnes
"Deep in the survival bunker, the last surviving bureaucrat recorded his presentation from all the chairs in the room. Later, after he had reviewed and transcribed all the recordings, he would compile the summaries, send himself an executive report, and hold another meeting to discuss it. But for now, his report on current stocks of canned rations, office supplies, and neckties was receiving the full attention it deserved." — JohnBarnes
"Status check... Which meeting am I on? Kinda lost track of these cameras." — ms.akkineni
"OK, all cameras focused on me!" — DHagar
"May I have your attention, please? Turn your lenses this way." — Ariella
"Who farted?" — Joe (Subjective humor disclaimer.)
"I'm glad we were able to come to a resolution." — Joe
"We're still waiting for a clear signal from the CEO." — Joe
"We've had problems with people stealing furniture from the conference room." As you can see, the room is virtually packed." — more Joe
"So, any ideas on how we can reduce our bandwidth usage?" — last Joe
Thanks again everyone. The next contest is on the way.
— Mike Robuck, Editor, Telco Transformation
